A Wedding Gift Gone Wrong: The Family Drama Unfolds
My husband and I decided to buy our granddaughter Eloise a wedding gift from her registry, a special air fryer she had picked out. But instead of gratitude, we got a shocking response. Eloise accused us of being cheap! Now she’s angry and even threatening to cut us off because we didn’t give her a cash gift like we had done for her siblings.
I’m in my 70s, a proud grandmother to five incredible grandkids—three wonderful girls and two handsome boys. I love them all deeply and have always been there for them emotionally and financially. Whether they’re celebrating big moments or facing tough times, they know they can count on me. Eloise got married last October, and my husband, who is also in his 70s, and I had high hopes for her new chapter.
I suspected that maybe she didn’t believe we would give her such a large cash amount after only gifting her the air fryer. During our phone call, she said, “No, it’s clear. You just don’t love me enough to show it. You know how much pressure I’m under with the wedding. And then, this? It’s like you don’t even care.” Then, with a click, she hung up.
We were shocked. After her harsh words, we tried to make amends by buying her a beautiful china set, hoping it would smooth things over. But we ultimately decided against giving her the $40,000, feeling she hadn’t earned it.
Fast forward to last week. Eloise spoke to her brother and found out that we were telling the truth about the money we had given to her siblings when they got married. After checking with her cousins, she called us again, furious. “I just found out that it’s true you gave the money to everyone else when they got married. Why didn’t I get anything?”
We stood our ground. “We felt after your reaction to the wedding gift, it wasn’t right to go ahead and gift you the money,” we explained. Eloise was desperate, trying to turn our hearts. “So, you’re punishing me? Is that it? Because I was upset about an air fryer?”
I was furious that she didn’t see what she had done wrong. “It wasn’t about the air fryer, Eloise. It was how you spoke to us, the disrespect. That’s not something we expected or can support.”
Tears filled her voice as she pleaded, “But that’s so unfair! I was stressed, Grandma. Planning a wedding is hard, and I just snapped. I didn’t mean any of it.” While I understood she was stressed, I believed she should apologize instead of making excuses. I told her, “We understand that it’s a stressful time, but actions and words have consequences. We hoped you’d understand the value of family and love over material things.”
But Eloise didn’t give up. “But you don’t understand! Can’t we just forget all this happened? I need that money, Grandma.” She threatened to boycott Christmas and accused us of cutting her off, but we remained firm.
In the end, I said, “We love you very much. This has nothing to do with cutting you off. We just hope you’ll reflect on this and understand why we made our decision.”
Now, Eloise is following through on her threat and boycotting Christmas. Her mother, our daughter-in-law, is siding with her and calling us unreasonable. But we feel that after all we have done for Eloise—paying for her college, while her parents covered her graduate school and half the wedding—gifting her an air fryer shouldn’t have triggered this reaction. Plus, Eloise and her husband are doing financially well and don’t desperately need our money.
Our reason for sending the air fryer early was that we live far away, so we always send our gifts in advance. The wedding gift is separate from the cash, which we hope will help with something meaningful, like buying a home.
Despite the chaos and Eloise’s refusal to see our side, my husband and I stand by our decision. Love and respect are everything to us, and we hoped this would be a learning experience for her. The holidays might be quieter this year without her and her family, but we remain hopeful for healing and understanding in the future. Our door and hearts will always be open to Eloise whenever she’s ready to mend fences.
What do you think about all of this? Share your thoughts in the comments!
